The BattleCry Of the Worrier

Image by Bradyn Trollip

I am one of the world’s great worriers. I cannot help it, it is who I am. I have tried to overwrite the conditioning that caused this character trait by saying affirmations and having mental arguments (I always lose, LoL) It’s certainly not ideal for one’s health to have mental worries that can cause a myriad of ailments like fatigue and digestive issues. A racing heart? check. Elevated blood pressure? check. I have always worried. I remember how the worry felt when I was just a kid and unable to see it in a larger context. I am certain no one explained to me how to be this type of person so I can only assume it is simply innate, part of my human design. Like, literally.

I learned about a thing called Human Design, rather late in life, for I imagine it could have been super helpful if I had the knowledge earlier on. The exciting thing about Human Design, is that it doesn’t simply describe your personality in a way that leaves you with confirmation of things you already know about yourself. It helps you see traps in your own design, and a strategy you can cultivate for living well. (If your interest is piqued, you can click here.)

So what’s my strategy for avoiding the anxiety trap? Listening to my inner authority, and letting my intuition lead the way.

I have learned SO MUCH about how the brain and body work when it comes to processing emotions like fear, and how that process can result in anxious feelings. Did you know that your brain knows things before you do? Basically this means that we have a built-in program that is coded like a row of falling dominos, perfectly executed to follow commands in order. I don’t know what makes the first domino go, but at some point, for me I am aware of a switch flicking inside me, and before I know it, I feel a pump of adrenaline followed by racing thoughts, a light sweat, quicker breaths, you get the picture. My brain knows how to set off this response before I even realize it’s happening! Talk about feeling helpless to one’s own body. The bottom line is that it’s highly unlikely I can simply learn to shut off my anxious thoughts like water from a faucet. But perhaps I can intentionally mix up the coding signals and that will throw off the chain of commands.

A lot of research and YouTube videos about neuroscience led me to try some things. To my delight, I can largely control my autonomic nervous system with certain types of breathing. So when I sense the first signal, like the adrenaline pump, I immediately engage in breath work, and I can generally head off the anxiety before it has the chance to culminate in a full-blown panic attack. I love the breath bubble on the Calm app, for its visual cues. Also you can find science backed research about the autonomic nervous system at Huberman Lab out of Stamford University. Here is one of their helpful videos.

Also I have discovered that it is important for me to be more grounded in my body because my personality type leads me to be overly in my head, usually overthinking. I vividly recall my childhood and having very involved and detailed daydreams that people would have to call me back from. I’m sure more than one of my grade school report cards referenced my trouble maintaining focus, haha! Before starting down the wellness and spirituality path, I often used the word “untethered” to describe to myself the way I was feeling. I felt like my head was free floating away from me. Grounding techniques and somatic exercises have helped me, and include things like EFT tapping, qigong, going barefoot outside, having technology-free time, and doing guided meditations that focus on body parts.

All this is to say, you can outwit your brain. It can just take some time to identify your patterns and design a plan to disrupt them. Of course, me being the over-thinker that I am, it took some time to build new routines and encode them because I generally prefer stay in my comfort zone, which is the procrasti-research lane. I’d rather read the manual than actually do the things it suggests!

If you’re wanting to work through any of the patterns in your life that have been throwing you off balance, feel free to reach out. I love to connect on this topic!